Explain this to me

"Your lights are on" is one thing, but this?

This had to be like the sixth inning or so. What I can't figure out is if this is some weird joke, or how an Orioles fan could actually leave their car running in the parking lot while they're inside at the game. Yeah, I know, there's that remote starter thing, but come on- what are the chances?

Congrats to Chris Clark, the newest captain of the Washington Capitals. GM George McPhee had this to say about him:

“Leadership is not a sometime thing or a come and go thing,” said McPhee. “It is an all-the-time thing. Chris Clark has all-the-time leadership qualities. He is a leader in the mold of one of our all-time favorites, Dale Hunter; a quiet man off the ice, a cantankerous, ultra-competitive player on the ice.”

I love that he called him "cantankerous," like he's 80 years old or something. Then again, compared to most of the kids that will be on the team, he's one of the old guys- at 30. Damn.

Steinberg over at the Sports Bog did a nice review of the most popular jersey sales in various sports. The comments were great too:

At least people are buying actual jerseys. I always get the guy in front of me that has his own last name.
Nothing like a No. 1 Penguins jersey that say "WILSON".
I hate that guy.

Amen, brother. I couldn't agree more. I hate doing a double take at the number- "Wait, #7 isn't Jablonski. Who IS that guy?" Then realizing what's going on, and thinking the guy's an idiot.

And then there's this guy, who apparently hearts Landon Donovan and doesn't think much of Dan:

Wow, you sure have a thing about Landon Donovan. I suppose I'd be critical, if you weren't a world-class athlete yourself.

Whatever, dude. I'm sure you're pulling in the millions yourself as a top player for a professional sports team.

And finally, something my co-worker sent to me:

Three football fans were on their way to watch the game when one noticed a foot sticking out of the bushes by the side of the road. They stopped and discovered a beautiful nude female passed out drunk.
Out of respect and propriety, the Ravens fan took off his cap and placed it over her right breast.
The Dolphins fan took off his cap and placed it over her left breast.
Following their lead, the Redskins fan took off his cap and placed it over her crotch.
The police were called and when the officer arrived, he conducted his inspection. First, he lifted up the Ravens cap, replaced it, and wrote down some notes. Next, he lifted the Dolphins cap, replaced it, and wrote down some more notes.
The officer then lifted the Redskins cap, replaced it, then lifted it again, replaced it, lifted it a third time, and replaced it one last time.
The Redskin's fan was getting upset and finally asked, "What are you, a pervert or something? Why do you keep lifting and looking, lifting and looking?"
"Well," said the officer, "I am simply surprised. Normally when I look under a Redskins hat, I find an asshole."